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  • Writer's pictureMisti Luke, LCSW

Managing Anger

Updated: Aug 29, 2019

Anger is a normal, typically healthy, human emotion. But when it gets out of control and turns destructive, anger can lead to problems at home, stress in social settings and difficulties in the workplace. In extreme cases, angry outbursts can even lead to costly legal issues.

Fortunately with practice, anyone can learn to reduce angry feelings and most importantly, control negative angry outbursts, such as harming property or other people.

Here are 7 tips to help you manage your anger.

Identify Triggers Before you can control anger, you must identify the cause(s),-or triggers, that make you to go from 0 to 99 in ten seconds flat.

Take a Time Out Simply walk away. Remove yourself from the source of anger, if at all possible. Take some deep breaths while counting to one hundred. Walking away from an angry situation signals bravery and courage.

Once You Are Calm, Express Your Anger After you have taken a "time out" express your feelings in an assertive, but not confrontational manner. State your thoughts and needs clearly, using "I" statements. If you feel the need to yell or use profanity, this is a sign you have not calmed down enough to express your anger in an appropriate, non threatening manner.

Think Before You Speak In the heat of the moment, it's easy to say something you could regret later. Take some time to collect your thoughts before speaking. Choose your words carefully.

Identify Solutions Instead of focusing on what made you mad, try to resolve the issue that caused anger in the first place. Remind yourself that anger will not fix the problem and typically only makes it worse.

Get Some Exercise If you find yourself angry on a regular basis, consider adding physical exercise to your daily routine. Go for a walk or participate in some type of physical activity.

Take a Nap Lack of sleep can contribute to heightened feelings of frustration and anger. Make sleep a priority in your life to increase your ability to control angry outbursts. Your family, friends and coworkers will thank you for it.

Misti Luke maintains a part-time counseling practice in Broken Bow, Oklahoma, If you are in need of anger management counseling, you can learn more about Misti's cognitive behavioral, anger management group here.


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